Run by the same Spanish clan that runs Mallorca and Marbella restaurants, Brassa is Cleveland’s Brazilian style steakhouse or churrascaria. The concept is simple, beautiful, and evil all at the same time. Sit and enjoy a beverage while you sample the offerings from the well stocked salad bar, which includes items such as peeled shrimp, bound and fresh salads, and veggies. Just don’t eat too much.

When you are ready to experience meaty Armageddon, simply flip the little round card on your table over to the other side and Ingrid Newkirk will shudder in horror as her nightmares come to life. Servers with sub-primal cuts of all things animal will sidle up to your table and slice off pieces of anything that interest you. Typically there are about 16 different meats each night. BTW that’s what the little ice-cube picker-upper tongy things are for…it took me a couple of minutes to figure out I had a part to play. Now they will continue to bring these protein laden swords to your table until you cry mercy. The meats are surprisingly good for a place that lets you gorge yourself and they often offer a couple of items that don’t make regular trips around the room. Last we were there chicken hearts were the unlisted addition. We found the top and bottom rounds, the parmesan crusted filet mignon, the lamb, and the chicken sausage to be outstanding, requiring multiple trips to the table.

Desserts are available but are a fool’s errand, distracting the weak as they slide back down the food chain. If you are a fan of protein and have trouble deciding which phylum suits your palette on any given night, this is the place for you. If you have trouble stopping avoid this place like the plague, you might well die in your chair rather than stumbling greasily into the night.